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Suggested mods (stocking stuffers) for the wife?


wlepse

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Ooh, try this one... I once caught her putting my Henckel's Pro S 10" granton edged slicer in the dishwasher.

OMG...my wife puts our Henkel knives in the dishwasher too but drives me even crazier is when she drops them in the sink and then covers them up with whatever other pots and pans she used. I get so pissed, besides the fact it sucks for the edge I just know someone is going to get hurt reaching in the sink.

 

Also she has a tendency to only use the pairing (sp?) knife for everything. Drives me nuts, use the right tool for the job! We too used to have a nice set of Calphalon non-stick cookware. i thought it was safe since I got rid of all the spoons, spatulas etc that had metal but one day saw her stirring something a soup spoon. :banghead: Probably doesn't help either when she burns stuff into the pans. Now we have a Calphalon SS set which I am hoping is somewhat indestructible.

 

Sad part is she is still much better than two of my sisters. One once failed making pasta because she forgot to add water to the pot and people smelled something funny. Turned out to be the handles melting. Another time she put a pizza in the oven to keep warm....at 450...in the box...and sat on the deck for 20 minutes enjoying some drinks. :hysterical:

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Henkel knives and Calphalon cookware - I see a pattern here.

 

The one that drives me nuts is my wife continuing to use a fork to scramble the eggs instead of the small metal whisk I bought specifically for that task and which works absolutely perfectly. She also thinks it's better to season the eggs after they're in the pan than while you're whisking them and she thinks it doesn't matter which rack in the oven you use when baking.

 

Aaarrrggghhh!

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Oh just thought of another one...she had to buy this nice (expensive) omlette pan but often uses a fork to go around the edge. She claims it is necessary because it sticks. I then pointed out that it probably sticks because the fork has removed the non-stick coating. This is immediately followed by the look...not sure if everyone gets the same look when they try to use logic and reason.

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Okay, let me share how I've addressed some of these things. We can share coping mechanisms...

 

My KitchenAid mixer is in a bottom cabinet. It's about 40 lbs. Oh, wait, all of the attachments are in the very top of a wall cabinet.

Her knives are in a drawer beneath my knife block.

Her two pans are pink. That way, she thinks I got them for her out of kindness, not that I'd rather have her ruin $30 in pans instead of $300 pans.

My cast-iron pans are hidden in a plastic storage container in the garage. That way, they can't accidentally sit in the sink for a day or two full of soap and nasty food.

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Okay, let me share how I've addressed some of these things. We can share coping mechanisms...

 

My KitchenAid mixer is in a bottom cabinet. It's about 40 lbs. Oh, wait, all of the attachments are in the very top of a wall cabinet.

Her knives are in a drawer beneath my knife block.

Her two pans are pink. That way, she thinks I got them for her out of kindness, not that I'd rather have her ruin $30 in pans instead of $300 pans.

My cast-iron pans are hidden in a plastic storage container in the garage. That way, they can't accidentally sit in the sink for a day or two full of soap and nasty food.

 

The one flaw in your plan is that you are taking away things that are used for work, and most of us would be ok with that. Especially the cast iron that does not require actual washing. Getting her pots and pans taken away so you cook is evil genius.

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No, trust me. She can not cook anything unless a start button is involved. It's not that she's maniacally defeating me. She can't cook and has no desire to. She would rather get in her car and drive to get fast food than cook something. My wife is bizarre. She won't eat steak, but she'll eat hamburger. She won't eat pork, but she'll eat bacon. She won't eat a chicken breast, but she'll tear up some McNuggets. And finally, she won't eat anything that has ever swam.

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Ok, since we're venting......

 

I'm whisking the eggs before scrambling them and I put salt and pepper in the bowl with the eggs, then start whisking. My wife says she prefers to put the salt and pepper on the eggs in the pan before she starts folding them around in the pan with a spatula to cook them. I ask her why her method is better than mine and she says because it FEELS like her method distributes the seasoning better than using a wire whisk.

 

And last week she was putting something in the oven to bake and I had the lower rack on the bottom for cooking pizza on a stone and the upper rack in the middle position. So instead of putting the tray on the middle rack, she moved the middle rack to the top and moved the bottom rack to the middle. When I tried to explain to her that it wasn't necessary to move the racks I just got a blank stare.

 

 

Can't live with them........can't shoot them........

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Thanks for the good laughs! I think my wife and I would be separated if I ever caught her using fork on nonstick. I'm not worried about the product getting ruined, but eating that crap is horrible for you.

 

We also have 2 sets of knives in the house: The family set that stays on the counter and my Cutco set that stays in the case. :)

 

 

Dingo:

 

at least your wife will eat bacon. My wife won't eat pork of any kind (non-religious) and will go as far is not kissing me if I have eaten pork in the last 24 hours.

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Would I be out of line if I asked for Adriana Lima stuffed in fishnet stockings?

Stuffed does not make me get a nice visual. Reminds me of some of the unfortunate bathing suit cover ups I saw at the local water park. I am not sure why people think they look good extruding out of their clothing, nor can it be comfortable.

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Stuffed does not make me get a nice visual. Reminds me of some of the unfortunate bathing suit cover ups I saw at the local water park. I am not sure why people think they look good extruding out of their clothing, nor can it be comfortable.

 

Don't take it literally. Google images is your friend.

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  • 5 months later...

Well reviving this thread from the dead...a few weeks back on the way home from work I got a frantic call from my wife that was overly dramatic about how she set the place on fire. The truth was somewhere between the place being on fire and using a lighter...closer to a lighter. But non the less she did manage to set a piece of tuperware on fire. Apparently a few days before she hid it in the oven to keep it away from our little guy and forgot about it. Then turned on the oven to 450F and when it beeped that it was at temp she opened it to see flames. Luckily no one was hurt and nothing was damaged, except for the tuperware. But this reinforces the special steps that need to be taken if she is working in the kitchen. Oh and man was that a PITA to clean up. Between the fire extiguisher dust and melted plastic I was at it for hours.

post-15776-0-50079900-1338213263_thumb.jpg

Edited by wlepse
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